Last night was the longest night of the year.1
The shortest day.
Winter Solstice.
It’s also my anniversary…
Five years ago today, my now wife got out of quarantine in Bangkok.
The world was still amidst this lockdown nonsense. Which my future bride and I thought was the best time to fall in love with someone from the other end of the earth.
Of course.
Funny enough, I also had my first jiu-jitsu tournament in Bangkok that morning. (I won silver.)
So after sufficiently covering my body with the sweat of other men while choking and trying not to get choked, I met my love in my hotel.
Five years and two kids later… well the rest is history.
So it seemed fitting to drop this fan favorite from that year
How to Help Her Into Her Feminine covers what a man can do help a woman move from her competitive (“masculine”) self to her interdependent (“feminine”) self.
It draws on some fringe lessons from BDSM, evolutionary biology, and case studies from many guys I’ve helped.
I recorded it shortly after our daughter was born. I wonder if you can hear the drop in testosterone in my voice.2
00:00 Irony of Attraction Shifts
04:53 If Mama Ain’t Happy... the whole house crumbles
10:54 Asymmetry + Connection Yin-Yang
18:03 Concentric Circles Hierarchy
21:05 The Polygyny Threshold
27:47 Women’s Dual Stress
30:05 Risks of Vulnerability
39:03 Demonstrate, Don’t Demand
43:40 Vision as Leader
If you’re in then northern hemisphere, of course.
Babies lower testosterone. The increase in prolactin in nursing mothers suppresses LH and FSH which men need to produce T. My bloodwork around this time showed a ~25% drop in total testosterone from my previous.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3324676/
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2778443/
